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Chapter 9
Love and Non–Love
In his eulogy, Chris said, “I have four grandchildren and I love them all as much as Sophie, but our relationship was different, a much greater bond. One reason was because she was sick, and I also took care of her when Maria went back to work. But the real reason was that we understood each other exceptionally well. Her love at that age was so delicate, endearing and sensitive.”
Sophie loved the movie “Snow White” and all the songs in it. She would watch it with Chris over and over. She would say, “I like it so much because it has so much love in it.” Sophie would ask to have the movie fast-forwarded through any scenes that were scary or unappealing to her.

Chris, an engineer, would have long intellectual talks with Sophie about “What is love and what is not”. Sophie made up her own word to describe the topic. “There is Love and there is Non-love, and that is all there is”. Chris said, “Well, what about indifference? Sometimes people have no feelings either way about something. They don’t love it but they don’t not-love it. That is called indifference.” Sophie thought about this for a while and then said, “There is only love and non-love. Indifference is non-love.” Imagine these words from a four year old.
Scholars say the devil’s favorite color is grey because that is where Satan fools us into forgetting that our decisions are either right or wrong or “Love and Non-love.”
Chris identified with her because she had the intellectual mind of an engineer and could think and reason with unwavering conviction. Yet she was filled with such innocence, trust, and love!